Screaming in my head over what I had known was the inevitable. Wishing I could slap your face, and at the same time wishing I could kiss it just once more. I just wish that it was all a dream; that I would wake up crying in your arms, that you would hold me in arms that hadn't held her. I wish that you could just STOP hurting me with your passive lips. That last night, you'd kiss me with your passive lips, when I had much preferred that you had slapped my instead. You have no idea how much le...
I want to rush down the street, totally unprotected by any metal around me except for the Harley between my legs. Everything and everyone being just a soft blur and out of my mind. I want to breath the air, everything just flying past me, Faster, Faster, I tell myself. Torn between my newfound adolescent conscious and my mother’s old-fashioned harpings about the speed devils on the road. Suddenly, all of her everflowing resentments towards me about the life she gave up and the hardships all b...
As a doll, I was made to be adored, and cherished. As a perfume, I was meant to be sniffed by power and recognised by malice. As a string of pearls, I was to be bought by a certain price, well over what it took to make. As a pinstriped suit, I was made to impress, and stir up an aire of assumption. As a kite, I was made to be light, dancing, airey, and entertaining. As a woman, it seems, I was meant to be inanimate.
Well here she is again, fully equipt with wounds that need a conciderate amount of licking. Yea, I'm not here for sympathy, just to houl to the moon "woe is me". Well, my mum told me that I'm not going to England after all. My dog, my perfect dog, who was my pintacle of happiness, and only perfect thing in this world, died in her sleep, at age 3. We were a month away from her fourth birthday. My so-called true mate left me ages ago. Mum says we're facing a couple foreclosures. Both of our hou...
Well, I've had a busy week, and I'm about to have another one. I've been sick in bed with mono, and I have no clue how I got that. (Yup, that's right. I didn't get it the fun way:( ) SO! My mum is suing my school, so I'm going to a different one now. A normal school, complete with cheerleaders, jocks, geeks, pot-heads, ect. g2g
She was the only true friend that I had ever had. Her sweet perfection was like the bitter red nectar running through my veins. Fragile, but not knowing it, she would hurt who hurt me, love who loved me. My guardian angel behind the scenes. Rich apple head, with soft spirals. When anyone looked into her eyes, it was more like they were looking through her eyes, into her brain. They would see the wheels turning inside of her, and just know that she wasn't the norm. She was my sweet perfection....
Brown eyes, so captivating, and world so round through them. No more has any problem bothered me, nothing exists. This rushing feeling comes as I approach, walking the long narrow tightrope to your table, and I ask, as our eyes meet, is this real?I stop, in front of you and that younger girl by you, who I can only assume is your sister, gives me a look. I stutter for a second and then the words that I find coming out of my mouth, instead of a beautiful impromptu sonnet, is "Where is the bathr...
The rain comes down whenever I need it. It's kind of funny how that works. It comes when I don't need it and yet it comes when everything is beautiful. Last night was beautiful. It was a flaming liberal high schooler's dream. I went to the Free Democracy Summit. They had pannels there, and each talked about some kind of issue that no one really knew that much about, i guess. The ones that I went to were poverty in the 21st century, which was a very mind-opening thing and the gay marriage/unio...
Another day in the life of lisalee. Yesterday was the day of silence. I participated, and I protested with my friends downtown, standing on the corner of the busyest street downtown. Alot of people honked, i guess that was cool. I came to school with duct tape over my mouth and lips drawn on it with nail polish. Alot of homophobic bastards made fun of us, calling me gay and crap, but i don't care. I think it helped a little to have people know that they're supported. I told my friend that I'...
Well it's raining out tonight. It's been raining for the past three days. But even the rain is no comfort for the incomplete feeling in my gut that was there for about a couple of weeks now. It hurts a little. A little more each day. This is the first time that the rain hasn't made me feel good. It still hasn't worked. My heart has been broken and it's not healing like it usually does. My porceline heart has always survived little cracks and punctures, but not like this. He split it in half t...
Don't tell me what's on your mind Don't make me think you love me Don't tell me that this is forever, Please don't tell me that you won't break my heart. No one knows what will happen until it does. No one knows when they will die until they do No one knows that they love someone until they know for sure what love is So don't tell me beautiful things that will make me melt as we dance to the prettiest slow song known to man On this floor of smoke and balloons Don't talk Let's...
Summertime is finally here. I've been having so much fun. The other night was one purely out of the movies. It was much more fun though. All that day was sunny and beautiful. The baseball field over the lake was brisk and pretty. My favorite cousin in the whole world came back from st. louis and was spending time up here, but that's not the fun thing. I had woken up with no real thought comming to mind except for my daily horiscope and my chihuahua needing a bath. I took a bath myself, an...
Hey, i hate it when all the people around me change while i stay the same. My cousin has developed in mind as well as body. What ever happened to the girl who begged me to tell her stories, who wanted to grow a puppy farm? I know, i know, people grow, bla bla bla. BUT WHY COULDN'T SHE JUST BE A LESBIAN? I seriously could deal with all this puberty talk alot easier if she were a lesbian. I just can't see her liking the same things that i do. i don't even know why i have such a wierdness funk o...
It's really funny how one simple thing can totally screw your good mood out of existance. I was having a great day so far. I woke up, had Special K, my mom told me that my cousin, Jesse, is going to bring me to Germany for 2 weeks this summer. I'm applying for classes in college (when your in high school, you can get classes for FREE!) I'm applying for psychology, anthropology, and photography. I just got into photography when my mom brought out her old 70's professional camera that she used...
Everything seems SOOO incredibly new! I don't know why, I'm just feeling great! You know that rush that you get when you wear that skirt a little too high and that shirt a li'l bit too low? Even if you are just playing with the men's minds, it's fun to get whistles when your walking down the damp sunny street downtown. Guys honking at you, you look super offended, but inside you just kinda smirk... Ladies don't smirk, so that's why you do it inside. Then, I was walking through this crowd at...