Pain/ Deep inside my soul/ Im sad, but I’m not sure why / All that I know is what I feel / And that’s sad right now/ In all its glory and torment / For better or worse,/ Mostly worse// Scared/ A streak of it tumbles Clumsily down my spine and neck/ Much like the beads of sweat that follow/ Why does this make me feel this way/ Nothing to scare / me nothing to hurt me/ it just does / for better or worse// Lust/ To do the wrong thing / right makes sense but the lus...
Ever do that thing where your suppose to fall and let the person behind you catch you? It's suppose to build trust. I did that once, only they didn't catch me, and i cracked my head open on the cement. (okay, a little overdramatized on the cracking it open, but it was still pretty bloody) I hated that person for like a week after that, cus i had to get stitches and everything. He turned out to be my best friend later on. But the funny thing is that he betrayed the whole "trust" thing when he dec...
Sometimes i wake up and look at my life and think, "if only i were only awake falling asleep instead of vice versa so that this life would all just be a big dream" Its funny how many people want to believe that. But if your good enough with self mind control, you could always not even think about your real life and just live in your dreams where you control everything. Control is a big factor in society now adays. Some people can control a whole country, (whether they know what to do with it or ...
the rain drowns out my happiness drowning in the extacy of the rhythems outside focus on everything but the task at hand have all problems drift away, and there they'll stay How do you do it, every day just like the last not even thinking of our past but do not be decieved your more like a dream than you seem For dreams aren't real and neither are you your as fake as my aunt's nails dont front, you know its true Dreams always look more wonderful than they would be if they w...
A shout out to the man who hurt me as a child who stunted me forever to be large and akward on the outside but inside vulnerable and mild I hate you because i loved you and all that you had to say for it was lies and pain i saw in your eyes, that beautiful person who secretly loved me back but their only moments every other time i see what society has made you Your pathetic abandoning your friends and all that you hold dear, for a bone to be tossed to you from the society that wre...
The daily drift of thoughts, and nothing constructive enough to even mention. no conclusions. no new appiphanies about life. just useless thought. Thought that just makes me more sad. More demented and strange. I was at this local concert of bands and stuff, and it was the first time i felt happy in a while. I moshed and drank and had complete strangers' sweat on my body, and feeling just fine about it. i imagined that we were all in the bottom depths of hell, strange forms demented in...
Forever plagued with the disease of the outsiders. The act of being different, of being just what i wanted to be, has come at the great cost of being forever alone. No one here, except for my mom that is, lol. What kind of life is one spent in isolation? I guess it's all for the best, for they always go away sooner or later, and even if their one of those few that stick around, some one will die first. And then ur off to a new life, in all of its glory and torment. Emotion sucks so much. It ...
sadness consumes my everyday, and i am sick as hell of teachers who dont have anything better to do than be total yuppie freaks with the "stick up there" walk. If they ever were bonified teens, (nerdy little straight a students DONT count) then they would know y i act like i do. They never would understand any aspect of my life, and just because they have no worries, doesn't mean that i dont. I am at risk of flunking math, and all that anyone can say about it is "try harder" and while they're up...
Too tall, too big, too depressed, too fake-chearful, too ready to give it all up! I dont get these stupid people telling me what I am or am not. From teachers to orthadontists to strangers in a chat room. They know nothing about who I am, or what Im about. The thing that surprises me the most is the fact that they think i care what they say. All it does is make me more prone to piss them off. I am so stressed right now that it is'nt even funny. This morning I was going to get my new retainer, be...